My name is Isla, and I have chronic depression.

And im tired of being ashamed. I’m tired of having trauma. I’m tired of having to constantly explain myself, why I’m down, why I’m not well, why I’m not coping. This is a part of my life that’s not going away. This is something I will have to battle for the rest of my life. […]

3 years

It just doesn’t seem real. 3 years I’ve gone without you. 3 years since you took your last breath. 3 years since my world collapsed around me, and I had to rebuild it without you. This years anniversaries have hit me particularly hard, and I couldn’t work out why. But, then I did. This is […]

Have I Not Earned It Yet?

They say in life, you have to take the rough with the smooth, and the more heartache you go through, the sweeter the reward. I don’t fully agree with that. Because life isn’t simply rough and smooth; its jaggy, pointed, sharp, dull, electric, and so much more. And heartbreak doesn’t make your victories sweeter, it […]

Have I Not Earned It Yet?

Don’t Give Them A Reason

When i first dyed my hair pink, i hesitated. Why? I had wanted to have pink hair for ages, i had the kit, i knew it was going to look badass. I hesitated, because I didn’t want to give them another excuse to be targeted for unwanted attention. This has been drilled into me for […]

I’m Aff It.

I’m Scottish. Therefore, i like a drink. Usually, there’s nothing wrong with a wee dram every now and then, but sometimes it reaches a point where its not just a wee drink. It’s going through 6 pints of cider plus a bottle of wine. Its thinking nothing of getting through a bottle of gin in […]

An Open Letter to my Husband

Dear Stuart, First of all, let me tell you that i love you just as strongly as i did when you were alive. I miss you every day, and i think about you all the time. Time is a great healer, but although the sting has gone, the ache remains. And I had to do […]

BITCH NIGHT

WHAT’S THIS, A NEW VARIETY NIGHT THAT’S FEMALE-FRIENDLY WHILE STILL INCLUDING MEN BECAUSE EQUALLY IS AWESOME?! YES, THAT’S RIGHT, BITCH NIGHT IS HERE. Edinburgh’s premier female friendly variety night aiming to showcase the best talent across the country and the world! We have all manner of lady talent, from comedy, Spoken Word, music, dance, burlesque, […]

Widow Me This: The Show Notes

HEY! Remember when I was writing a blog about this stand up show I was creating for October, and giving you the run up to it and then went silent for months…? Well, apologies, I’m back and here is the show notes from 5 days of Widow Me This… It all because real when i […]

Coping

(Full disclosure; I was in a really bad place when I wrote this. This still sits in the back of my head most days, but generally I can get on with things. So don’t worry too much about me, this is just life for me right now) Nobody teaches you how to deal with this’. […]